It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize