I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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