I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
