Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
