Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Randomize
