I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Randomize
