just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
My penis needs a shock collar
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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