we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
