And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
