i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
