tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
