ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
