do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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