how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
