There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
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