she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
