So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
