Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
