I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
