But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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