Will you blow on my dice?
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Randomize
