so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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