dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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