Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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