i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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