Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Randomize
