oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
