You're completely useless in the revolution.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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