4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
