are you still at the devil's house?
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
