chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
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