i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize
