So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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