Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I checked into jail on foursquare
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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