Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
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