Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
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