how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
