somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I want you more than these girls want KFC
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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