Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
