Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Randomize
