Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Hippo gnu deer
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
