It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Randomize
