You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
