Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Randomize
