I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
i think i have two assholes
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
