So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Randomize
