fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I need water and some morals
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
