Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Are my feet made of real feet?
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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