I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
