You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
